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An Open Letter to the People on My Bus Who Like to Jabber Incessantly at 7 AM

Posted on December 17, 2009 by eidolon

Please put a cork in it. 

I’m sure you’re perfectly nice people.  You’re well groomed, and you manage to get yourself to the bus stop before 7 in the morning.  So that’s good.

But.

You are not half as interesting as you think you are.  Not at 7AM.  Nope.  Not nearly so.

And, to the dude (you know who you are): if you’re going to flirt, for God’s sake, don’t do it by shouting across the entire width of the bus.  Nobody wants to listen to your attempts to put the moves on whatsherface.  Not at 7AM. 

(And whatsherface is probably wondering why you sit so far away from her when you’re trying so desperately to flirt.)

But hey, if shouting across the width of the bus is your game, then could you please not sit right behind me?  Just once?  Thanks, pal.

And to the high school students with the cell phones glued to your ears– thank you for sitting near the back, where the sound doesn’t carry as far.  I am not being sarcastic.  I appreciate it.  We all do.

Well, except for Dude and Whatsherface.

 

 

4 thoughts on “An Open Letter to the People on My Bus Who Like to Jabber Incessantly at 7 AM”

  1. Jenn says:
    December 18, 2009 at 10:50 am

    Yup. I agree. I’ve got the same type of people here. Add to that the experience of sitting on the inside seat, and two high schoolers sitting *on each others lap* on the seat next to me, while still talking at the top of their lungs to each other. *sigh*

    Reply
  2. Ty says:
    December 18, 2009 at 3:24 pm

    Some people are just desperate to remind everyone else they still exist. I’ve noticed a very real correlation between insecurity and loudness.

    Reply
  3. Ian says:
    December 18, 2009 at 9:12 pm

    On each others’ lap? Wow. Maybe I shouldn’t complain about the folks on my bus. At least on my bus the high schoolers sit in the very back, where the nonstop talking gets drowned out by the engine noise.

    Reply
  4. Ian says:
    December 18, 2009 at 9:14 pm

    I’ve noticed a very real correlation between insecurity and loudness.

    I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU MEAN. ARE YOU TRYING TO TELL ME SOMETHING?

    Reply

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