Please put a cork in it.
I’m sure you’re perfectly nice people. You’re well groomed, and you manage to get yourself to the bus stop before 7 in the morning. So that’s good.
You are not half as interesting as you think you are. Not at 7AM. Nope. Not nearly so.
And, to the dude (you know who you are): if you’re going to flirt, for God’s sake, don’t do it by shouting across the entire width of the bus. Nobody wants to listen to your attempts to put the moves on whatsherface. Not at 7AM.
(And whatsherface is probably wondering why you sit so far away from her when you’re trying so desperately to flirt.)
But hey, if shouting across the width of the bus is your game, then could you please not sit right behind me? Just once? Thanks, pal.
And to the high school students with the cell phones glued to your ears– thank you for sitting near the back, where the sound doesn’t carry as far. I am not being sarcastic. I appreciate it. We all do.
Well, except for Dude and Whatsherface.